March
06
Tags
Reading Outside the Box (and on it, and under it, and around it…) by Nancy Tandon
ACT ONE: EXPECTATIONS
INT. – LIVINGROOM – STORYTIME
Parent fluffs pillows on couch and calls children to her. Nearby is a basket overflowing with library books. First child chooses book and calmly snuggles next to parent. Second child races into room, listens for two seconds, then begins climbing on parent’s head.
CUT! Cut! This is not what reading looks like, is it?
For all the time I’d spent studying emergent literacy and language development, nothing had prepared me for the contingency that one of my own would not be a book lover. My firstborn had been a textbook reading partner. A painfully early riser, she had often logged whole hours of read-aloud time before day care started for the day. One of her first two-word expressions was “more book.” Naturally, I chalked this up to good parenting.
Enter Child #2. He didn’t ever participate in story time the way I expected. As he’s grown, what his reading life “looks like” has been a challenge for me to accept and encourage. How I wish I could package up and send some Nerdy blog posts back to my former self, including the recent ones on book shaming and the benefits of appreciating comic books!
It took some time, and a healthy dose of humility, for me to realize that by steering my son only towards what I deemed were “good” books, I was squashing his desire to read at all.
ACT TWO: REALITY
INT. or EXT. – WHENEVER, WHATEVER
Parent lets go of picture-perfect ideal of what reading should look like. Turns to camera and offers the following suggestions to encourage unique, out-of-the-box readers:
1) Allow for active listening.
By this, I mean letting a child be truly active while you read. It would drive me crazy when my son would slide off of my bed onto the floor headfirst, over and over, when I read to him in the evening. One night I challenged him to summarize what I’d just read, and he did it like a boss. Lesson learned. You do not always need to sit still to comprehend well.
2) Follow their obsessions.
Among the things that held my young reader’s attention were: a Batman book with sound effect buttons, the comic book that came with a new pair of sneakers, and a descriptive pamphlet from a package of action figure toys. We read them all. Ad nauseam.
I’m afraid I sometimes had a hard time hiding my disdain. But when my son looked up at me and said, “You hate this book, don’t you?” [I did – I hated that book with the sound buttons], I dug deep and replied, “I love that you love it.” And then I read it. Again.
3) Play on their sense of competition.
Pulling in the driveway one day, I noticed my kids were “calling” electronic devices they wanted to use when we got inside. Instinctively, I “called” the reading room (a little side room that I often read in). That’s all it took. Both kids clamored to join me there, and I practically choked on my smugness.
4) Seek out positive influences
One of my son’s friends is a boy two years older than him, who is an avid reader. I thank fate for that, and I milk it. The mere idea that “Jack liked this (or that) book” is enough to at least have it be considered.
Author visits are another prime opportunity to encourage new book choices. Sometimes, the influence goes beyond him being interested in the visiting author’s work. For example, for months I had been encouraging the 1999 Newbery award winner, HOLES by Louis Sacher. Only when author Tim Green visited our school and mentioned it was one of his favorites did my son decide it might be worth a look. Halfway through, he turned to me and said, “I can’t believe I didn’t want to read this before. It is so good!”
5) Keep the supply plentiful
I try never to miss the library book sale, and always keep the “library basket” full. Having plenty of books on hand increases the chance that there will always be something around the house my ‘picky reader’ will be interested in.
Going to the bookstore as a treat after doctor and/or dentist visits, or during long airport layovers, is another fun tradition. (Plus, let’s be honest, you know you want to go to the bookstore, too!). It’s a little pricier than ice cream, but you can limit the budget to paperbacks and/or clearance bins. Beyond that, allowing the book to be the reader’s choice alone is very empowering.
The story of the non-typical reader can have a happy ending. The more we meet children where they are, the more likely they are to become what we’re hoping for: lifelong, interested, engaged readers.
Nancy Tandon is a children’s book writer in Connecticut. She has degrees in Psychology, Elementary Education, and Speech-Language Pathology. She is especially fascinated by how the human brain processes language, and strongly believes that reading the written word helps us make sense of it all. Nancy lives with her husband and two children and hereby “calls the reading room, infinity!” Connect with Nancy on twitter: @NancyTandon
Love this! So glad you’ve found ways to make reading feel good for your son. He sounds like fun! & I covet your reading room, in a big way.
Thanks, Priscilla. I’m so glad my son was patient with me until I got it “right.” I’d let you have turn in the reading room, btw.
It’s all about adapting isn’t it? When something doesn’t work, change how you do it. If you goof up change what you did. When something new comes along, fit it in, make it work, or, take it out of the equation. Shelley Harwayne said, “Revision is a way of life”. I am constantly revising my reading life. When a book works I incorporate it into my life. When a book doesn’t work for me I give myself the freedom to try something else. We need to give our kids and our students the same opportunities to love it or hate it. Thanks for your thoughts and experiences.
I raised two readers. That said, I was lucky if my oldest read one book a year. She has light dyslexia. She always found reading a chore. Now at 30, she reads all the time. What changed? When she was 18, she went to Germany on a student exchange. As I packed 10 books for her, she complained that she wasn’t going to need them. I told her to humor me. By October she called me and wanted more. In a place where she had problems communcating, she found reading valuable. She has beea a reader ever since. I think the value our family puts on reading stuck with her. Everybody reads in our family.
What a great story, Marta! It reminds me of when we lose power, and the kids turn to books/flashlights. Books will always be there for us! So happy your daughter found her way to the joy of reading.
I feel like we are raising the same son! Falling off the bed during story time? That’s him! Recalling what was read? He’s a champ. His favorite way to read? Building Legos while listening to an audio book. I have had the same highs and lows regarding reading with my beautiful boy as you have had. When you see success, it’s so sweet though. Thank you for this great post!
My son is dyslexic. I read to him every night until he was 16 1/2 years old. His independent reading was limited to comic books. When he was about 21 he called me at work to share his ‘new’ discovery: the library! He is now an avid reader.
I enjoyed your post. Excellent insights and suggestions. My daughter loved to be read to but was reluctant to read on her own. She couldn’t sit still long enough. Wish I had all the tips from books like “Raising Bookworms” at my fingertips 20 yrs ago.
“You do not always need to sit still to comprehend well.” Such true and important words!
This is great stuff, Nancy. I especially enjoyed your phrase: “I practically choked on my smugness.” 🙂 Seriously, though, I think everyone can use some out of the box suggestions sometimes…
Great post! Thank you. We never know what it’s going to take to encourage our reluctant readers – so we have to try everything we can come up with! Kids’ author Tara Lazar offered more suggestions to supplement these in this similar post http://kateywrites.wordpress.com/2014/02/24/raising-readers-monday-guest-tara-lazar/