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READ, REFLECT, REACT by Katey Howes
I have three children in elementary school. I spend evenings with just-right books and book reports and reader’s theater rehearsals. I write children’s books – or try to – every day while they are away. I research trends in picture books, chat with booksellers and librarians, contribute to websites that celebrate children’s literature. I blog about raising kids who love to read.
I spend so much time immersed in a bookish life that sometimes, I forget to enjoy reading.
I forget to get lost in books.
I forget to let books change me.
I realized this not too long ago, when I finished reading a book – Inside Out and Back Again by Thanhha Lai – -with my ten-year-old.
“Did you like it?” I asked. “What was your favorite part? Would you like to read more books in verse?”
I got on Twitter and asked friends for recommendations. I added them to my Goodreads account.
While I did that, my daughter picked up the book, took it upstairs, and tucked it under her pillow.
“I like to have a dream book,” she told me. “I just like to spend time with it.”
She’s been doing that for years. She might stay up reading ‘til all hours. She might never open that book again.
Either way, she’s not done with it.
I know this, because I used to have dream books, too. Before I got so busy doing things with books, instead of letting them do things to me.
I know that later – maybe tomorrow, maybe in a week, maybe next year – she’ll want to talk about it again. She’ll have questions about language, or history, or about the author herself. She’ll want to learn more about refugees and start a collection box at school. She’ll write pages of free verse on the graph paper I gave her to keep her math homework neat.
I won’t get too irritated.
There is so much pressure in school to dissect books as we read them, pressure even in preschool and play groups to have extension activities and comparison titles and to talk about each picture before we turn the page. And all of these things are valuable learning and growing tools. (And I don’t say that just because I’m a sucker for a craft project!) But they neglect to acknowledge one simple thing.
Books take time.
Not just the time it takes to say the words – aloud or in our heads. Not just the time it takes to copy the title and author and minutes onto a reading log. Not just the time it takes to get 21 wiggly first graders to sit still on a rug and face forward.
Time to let the words and the meaning sink into our souls. Time to breathe the scent of paper and ink as you drift off to sleep. Time for sentences and characters and cliffhangers and commas to creep into our minds and reorganize things a bit.
So I have a new policy. I call it The Three R’s. Three R’s because that’s easy to remember, and because three is magical and because I’m corny and I love alliteration.
Read. Reflect. React.
That’s it. Read. Reflect. React. (though if 3 weren’t so gosh darn magical I could add Reread, or Reach Out, or…you get the idea.)
I will hold myself accountable for giving books the time they deserve.
I will Read – and leave it at that. Except that, figuratively speaking, I will then tuck the book underneath my pillow.
And when I happen to be ready to Reflect on it – the next morning, or the next week, or standing in line at the grocery store behind a woman whose voice sounds JUST how I imagined the main character’s voice would sound – then, I will dig a little deeper into what the book really means to me.
And when I’ve had the time I need to reflect, then I will React. Maybe that’s as simple as ordering the next book in the series. Or calling up a friend to chat about memories. Maybe it’s as complicated as changing my worldview. (Or perhaps, I’ll just make a craft.)
I’m expanding my Three R’s concept beyond my own reading life, and applying it to my children, as well.
When my first grader comes home with a Henry and Mudge and directions to “make connections to your own life,” I just let her read. I don’t look over her shoulder and I don’t make her write anything down. I also don’t make her put it right back into the Ziploc bag and into her backpack. It’s okay if the book sits on the coffee table for a while. Maybe she’ll look at the cover art and spend the afternoon drawing dogs. Maybe she’ll pick it up later and look for the funniest part. And when the neighbor’s big dog Kona gets loose again weeks later, we’ll take a ball outside and throw it and he’ll chase it right back to his own yard. And my first grader will spontaneously reference Henry and Mudge. She’ll have made those connections on her own.
Little ways, big ways, unimaginable ways. The books we leave time and space for become parts of our existence. Without force, without machination, without a doubt.
I recommend you try it, too.
Read. Reflect. React.
Katey Howes is a children’s author writing picture books, chapter books, and middle grade novels. Her debut book, GRANDMOTHER THORN, will be released by Ripple Grove Press in 2017. Grandmother Thorn is being beautifully illustrated by artist Rebecca Hahn. You can find Katey on Twitter @kateywrites.
Great post! I love books and the impressions they leave on our souls. 🙂
Thank you, Lisa! So glad you enjoyed it.
Oh my gosh, this post hit home with me. I’m a fifth grade teacher and many times covering the curriculum is so important that I forget about the fact that the reflection is the most important part of reading. Even in my read aloud I feel as though I’m always teaching or pointing out the lesson of the day. I need to remember that reading for the sake of enjoying is important too. Thanks so much for this post, I think you’ve just opened a whole new world for me. BTW a good book for grades 3-5 is Flora and Ulysses. So much fun to read!
Karen, I’m so glad this spoke to you! I do hope it helps you find ways to embrace a slower, reflective style of reading in your classroom sometimes. And I love reading Flora & Ullyses with kids!! Great suggestion!
Wow!!! This post is amazing. Well written 😊
Thank you, Ratika. I’m glad it spoke to you. Happy reading!
Looking forward to reading Grandmother Thorn!! Congrats, Katey!! 🙂
Reflection is definitely an art that I’m trying to practice in life and in writing–thank you!!
Thank you! So nice of you to say. I agree that we can all spend more time reflecting – in books and in life – before reacting. Great point.
Great post! I have a couple of books that have left impressions on my soul! 🙂
That’s good to hear! I know I do, too. Thanks for reading & commenting!
This is a nice reminder, Katey. It’s easy to move straight to react (e.g. logging or reviewing the book) without taking time to reflect. And sometimes it’s easy to read too quickly, to finish, rather than to appreciate. One thing I do sometimes is stop reading a book before I reach the end, on purpose, so that as I drift off to sleep I can wonder about the end. I’m usually glad that I chose to wait, and give myself one more evening to wonder.
Thank you, Jen. That’s a great suggestion! I love that idea.
Dear Katey!
I inadvertantly practice the three R’s too. I read, but I could read way more if I just use my time for This and not something else. But I must say that I like it this way. I grab a book, which I think is the right book to read now, and then I start reading. I read sometimes 100 pages per day, and then 30 pages in 10 days.
I must say that the Harry Potter books are a part of my identity. In 2007, I started reading PS/SS and since then I slowly read all the following six books and watched all the eight books. I love reading fanfiction of it, and I love talking about it with other fans, we even have our own language, in some ways.
As Jo already said it: No story lives until someone wants to listen.
I didn’t read them very fast, for in 2009 I didn’t go to the cinemas since I haven’t finished HBP back then. But I’ve finished DH in 2010, and I went to the cinema for the last two movies.
No story has touched me again like this one, and I’m sure no story will be able to do that ever again, but I do love and will love other stories, of that I am sure.
And I haven’t listened to a HP podcast until last year, and now I really love it.
So, you’re right, the three R’s are definitely a very good way to approach the mystery of books.
Yours,
SeaofWords
I love that you were able to take your time and enjoy the entire HP canon that way. I loved reading them as they came out, with time between each for wonder! One of the best parts of reading any series is that anticipation of the next one.
Yes, it is. Sadly, I always miss that. Except for Cursed Child now and Fantastic Beasts. I’m so thrilled to participate again. I’m also participating in the #HPReadathon now. So wonderful.
I used to react to books and changed to responding. Reacting is the initial “I love/hate” and respond becomes the “why” I feel that way. But maybe that is actually reflection. The reading part–definitely!
I like the distinction you make – “responding” more so than “reacting.” Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Terrific post! I get so caught up in writing, researching and marketing, not to mention kids and home, I forget to enjoy reading too. I’ve tried to be better this summer but LOVE your three R’s:)
Karin, I’m so glad you enjoyed it. Yes! I find that when I’m writing or revising my own books, especially, I seem to analyze everything I read and have a hard time just enjoying them.. It’s well worth making the conscious effort, though.
Such a lovely post. I love your 3 R’s. Children (as well as adults) definitely need to have books they can savor.
Thanks, Kathleen! So gald you read and enjoyed it.
I love books that tug at your heart.. . books that you connect with become the best mentor text to share with students. . . they feel what you feel, see what you see!
I love this post. Books have been such a part of my life for a long time now. They have weaved their way into my everyday life in so many ways it’s hard to think of a life without books. One of my favorite parts of my book life is reading to my preschoolers. I do do the connective activities after reading the book for Circle time, but I keep all the books I have chosen on a shelf in our classroom and am always open to reading them whenever anyone asks. Many books become quick favorites and I end up reading the same book over and over again before they go back to the library. I have one student who comes to school and first thing she does is fill her “purse” full of her favorite books and then as the other students arrive, she pulls them to the beanbag chair with her so she can read them the books. She carries the books with her throughout all of her play until it’s time to clean up. She loves having them close and just looking at them when she can. She hates to see the books go back to the library, but is excited to see what I put on the shelf next. Maybe carrying the books around is her version of a dream book since she can’t take them home and put them under her pillow. Thank you for this post. It was wonderful and really made me think about books in my life.
What a wonderful story – and image – of your preschool student reading to her friends. I love picturing that! Thank you so much for sharing your special reading moments. It warms my heart!
Oh, this is SOOO TRUE!
I have a (grown up) friend who is a reader, but a “normal” reader. i.e. She reads a book a month, maybe less, but she doesn’t eat live and breathe books like I do. When I asked her the last time she finished a book what she would be reading next, she said she liked to wait a while before starting the next book. At the time, I scoffed a little (although only inwardly, of course!) as I have my next 100 books lined up and move swiftly from one to the next, reading maybe two a week and would never leave a “gap” just for the sake of it! I ALWAYS have a book “in my hand” (and am often reading more than one at once!) And of course picture books, stories for children, or novels for young adults are my favourite – not least because they are almost invariably “quick reads” (compared to, say, “War and Peace”….. which I do intend to get around to…… one day!)
Then a few months later someone criticised my choice of books for potential book club reading as being very “worthy” but they wanted “entertainment”…. I reflected on this a lot (of course I did, I am that sort of person – and I am sure this describes every member of the Nerdy Book Club too!) and I realised that he (yes, he! another blow!) was right – I enjoy being entertained too, but had let that consideration slide way down my priority list when I was choosing what to read next.
And now this post. All in all, a very salutory lesson. I have finally realised it takes TIME for human beings to assimilate any lesson in life!
Onwards and upwards!
In nerdy friendship, Esther
I’m honored to have your “nerdy friendship,” Esther! It CAN be hard to take time to appreciate the “entertaining” books when we feel there are so many “important” books waiting in line for us to read. But oh, it is such a good thing to do! I’m glad you are finding room for both!
Hi Katey! Your thoughts really resonated with me. I can relate to being involved with books and then not savoring them appropriately. My 3-year-old son helped educate me on that one. I found after a few months of diving through mounds of really fantastic picture books with him, that he was no longer interested in reading — something he’s loved since he was tiny. Now we pick one to read together about every month and read it over and over. That’s how he digs into books.
As for reading in schools — I was blissfully unaware of the way that public schools handle reading these days. My daughter went to private schools until she was halfway through fourth grade. I met with her 4th grade teacher about a month into her foray into public school and one of the things she counseled me on was that my daughter didn’t read fast enough. I had already been acclimating to the AR level reading where kids have to pick a book in a certain range of their ability, to the quizzes, and then this news? I just stared at her. My daughter doesn’t read slowly. When she reads out loud, it’s expressive and lovely and perfectly paced. Apparently though, there’s a push to get kids reading fast so that they can take in information at the pace of our hurried society. Ohhh not cool.
I’m glad that you’ve given your daughter the space to take in the books that she reads. It’s so valuable, as you said — making those connections, allowing books to change us. It takes time.
Thank you for sharing your experiences and insights. They really got me thinking. 🙂
Oh, and I also wanted to say that this teacher who broke the news about slow reading? Awesome teacher. Through my daughter’s public school experience, plus through family and friends, I have met some of the most passionate, dedicated, caring, skilled educators. I have a (very) hard time with some of the policies and practices that public teachers are required to work with based on district, state, etc. standards, and I know many teachers struggle with these matters as well. But to teachers working to instill a love of books and teach the required material in often over-full classrooms? You guys are heroes. I don’t know how you do it.
Sarah, I couldn’t agree more about those teachers who take the time and thoughtfulness and enthusiasm to instill that love of books in kids of all ages. They are my heroes! Thank you for sharing your experiences with me, and for letting me know my post spoke to you. It means a lot to hear that! All the best.
I am a retired Special Education teacher and children’s book author, too. I appreciate this post a whole lot. Thanks.
Thank YOU! I’m so glad it spoke to you and really appreciate your saying so. Best of luck to you in your writing!!
One of the best posts I’ve read in a while….
Aww, Kirsti, you are the sweetest! Thank you so much!
Great post! You are spot on with your topic! 😀
Thanks, Eric!! I’m glad you enjoyed it.
I absolutely love this post! I, too, in the busyness of writing and writerly activities, have not allowed myself to just be a reader. I shall change that immediately! And I love that your daughter puts dream books under her pillow! Thank you for sharing this inspiring piece.
I love the idea of a dream book. I have several books I wish I could put under my pillow at night so I could spend more time with the characters because I connected with the story on such a personal level. I think it’s a great visualization that could really connect kids with their books.